Advice for the heartbroken worker

Decide what you want, make a plan, get help and take action every day to get there.

Women at Work - Kristen Asleson column sig
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Working while experiencing a heartbreak is difficult. Working through a heartbreak from home during a pandemic is excruciatingly challenging. First and foremost, if you are suffering trauma, you are not alone. Ask for help because it is available.

For myself, I can name multiple emotional times over the course of my life that made working difficult. At the age of 18, I created an adoption plan for my first born, and leaving the hospital without a baby was traumatic to say the least. At that age, I did not work for quite some time while I healed. Fast forward to the age of 36, I became the mother of an addict who took three years of normalcy away. During that time, I took random days off due to exhaustion, numbness and the need to attend events at the treatment center. At 43, my dad passed away, and I took a week off, regrouped, and plowed back into work.

Time, age, and experience change how one works while suffering a debilitating event in life. One of the groups I belong to on social media is for women helping other female entrepreneurs. Just this morning a business owner asked the advice of others as to how to work through a heartbreak.

With permission, I share their tips:

“I fill my schedule with business related ‘stuff’. The shift of focus makes you forget and helps you heal.”


“Throw yourself into your work for a while. Eventually, you will look up and be over it.”

“It depends on your business. Sharing it could be beneficial in some cases, as could working it into the narrative of what you do.”

“Pour your heart into your work.”

“Remember that you might be just what someone’s business needs right now! Do not deny them of that. You can do so much good for others in the midst of a heartbreak.”

“Turn it into fuel for your fire. The best medicine and revenge are loving yourself, rising above and not letting it break your spirit.”

“Cry at night, listen to positive affirmations, and know this is part of life that almost everyone has to go through.”

“Get counseling.”

“Every morning, have some Zen time and focus on one day and breath at a time.”


“Give yourself some time to heal. You will damage yourself further if you are not operating where you want to be.”

“Find something that isn’t part of your work or home life to do.”

“Decide what you want, make a plan, get help and take action every day to turn things around – no matter how small. Take time to go through your emotions.”

“Sometimes being authentic about your journey draws in your soul tribe sisters and clients. Sometimes you need a break. Sometimes you just gotta push through. It’s a fine balance of the three.”

“Visualizing is the best thing you can do. Visualize the best and worst of times. Make a plan for what you can do to get through this. Visualize how it will feel to hit your goals and make it through the tough time.”

“Throw yourself into work, let your work give you energy and remind you that you still have important things in your life going on that need your time and focus. Take pride in the fact that you showed up for work and that feeling of pride will help lessen the feeling of heartbreak.”

What I have learned is that we are all unique. We all have a different story, and we all work through the tough times in different ways. As cliché as it sounds, “you do you and do what you feel is best for you.”

Kristen Asleson is owner of Midwest Virtual Assistants. Send comments and ideas to .


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