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Faceoff — Despite spending spree, Vikings need help

PHERSY: Man, you look short in that photo of us.

FELDY: I am short. Your head looks big. Must be the ego.

PHERSY: Ego? If only you knew how little I think of myself. OK, we better get serious or our bosses will cancel Faceoff before Week 2. People are talking about the Vikings’ offseason. What are your thoughts?

FELDY: They’ve spent a lot of money. Then again, Pac-Man Jones spent a lot of money (he "made it rain:" love that phrase) at the finest gentlemen’s clubs and look where he’s at — out of the NFL. What I’m sayin’ is, just because Bernard Berrian got $16 million guaranteed doesn’t guarantee he’ll be a true No. 1 receiver. That said, I like the fact that the Purple is trying to upgrade at positions of need.

PHERSY: The Vikings have done very little to excite me. Am I really supposed to get jacked up about the team overspending for a No. 3 wide receiver, signing an average fullback and a safety few fans had heard of? Yes, they signed Berrian, and they need loads of help at receiver. But it was a weak crop of free-agent receivers, so they had to pay Randy Moss and Terrell Owens money to a guy who’s never had a Moss or Owens season. And to this point, they haven’t addressed the need for a pass-rushing defensive end.

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FELDY: That defensive end thing is really chapping my Helga Horns. You’d think any decent d-end would want to play next to 628 pounds of Williams (hey, the Vikings media guide officially lists Pat Williams at 317 pounds; I’d like to get weighed on that scale). I mean, we finally get Green Bay’s Gunslinger, Riverboat Gambler, the apple of John Madden’s eye, to retire, and now the Purple has no one to put pressure on Brett Favre’s homeless bum-looking replacement, Aaron Rodgers.

PHERSY: Sadly, the Vikings will probably draft a defensive end. Do I need to mention their past draft failures at that position? Derrick Alexander, Dimitrius Underwood, Duane Clemons and Erasmus James are just a few of the Vikings’ recent first-round mishaps at that position. That’s one ugly list. Saying the Vikings made a splash in free agency this offseason is inaccurate. Considering their needs, they barely made a ripple. If they don’t do something soon, they’ll head into the draft badly needing a defensive end, backup quarterback and a tight end (Visanthe Shiancoe isn’t good). Last I checked, they only have one first-round pick. So now what?

FELDY: As much as I hate to say it, especially given this club’s track record, they’re almost forced to go with a defensive end in the first round. Chili and Rick Spielman think they’re set at QB and tight end. So, draft a defensive end in the first round, and if he doesn’t pan out, I hear Daunte Culpepper’s a free agent. Let’s bring him back, put No. 90 on him and line him up at end.

Ben Pherson and Jason Feldman are Post-Bulletin sports writers. For more "Faceoff" head to postbulletin.com/sports and look for the "Faceoff" link.

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